hard core, antagonistic and short. the band, the man and the music.
My superintendents are about as useful to me as the fissure on my asshole.
This might be completely out of character and not have any kind of context here, that’s also because nobody can portrait an honest depiction of who they are with pictures of other people. No matter anyways.
I arrived in Welland married and recently employed at Canadian Tire full time on the night shift. A huge change from, basically, keeping up an unemployed lifestyle nearly my whole life making music for nobody to really hear. I lived with my parents my whole life in the country up until then as well so this was a pretty large shock.
About a month into the move my wife gave birth to my son. It wasn’t a shock to me, not because of my experience with children, I don’t believe I held a baby before my son was born. It wasnt a shock because there were enough adjustments to make and having a child was a choice and a blessing. The night shift and stress of a, what I perceived as an, unhealthy work environment pushed the reality of the situation at home out of my mind.
The living arrangements at that time were a real issue and my wifes aunt, who we had moved in with due to her large home and only her living there, we’re becoming a problem. Six months or so after moving to Welland, where many good meals were cooked by my wife. Good times were had. Good conversations. And good memories, it was the best option as a family to find our own space.
At that time we moved to our apartment. It was there were things got to slow down a bit. Personal time. Personal enjoyment. Lots of luxury I have never had were here and a loving family waiting for me when I wasn’t working.
As time went by I earned a spot at Canadian Tire that was important. Half the people I originally worked with were let go. People I was comfortable with, and the presence of a direct manager. This increased the stress along with the workload. I began to be regarded more and more as a hard worker and I did like that.
Time passed and eventually my wife was again pregnant. Going back to work for a short time ment that I had to take less time working, which was not received easily at work. I found a way to fit the forty hour a week job into twenty. Month before that an eighty hour workload was compressed into forty.
I was finding enjoyment in making a home of the city. Found myself as the assistant superintendent of my apartment, though knowing nothing of repairing things and nothing about being any authority. Luckily out of ignorance and being timid I managed to do nothing and get paid for it for slightly over a year.
When my wife was back home ready to give birth to my daughter I returned full time at work. Being as paranoid as my boss was letting me compromise security the way I did was something that spoke to my importance there.
Being full time I felt things were almost too easy. The intensity of doing my full time job, with part time hours, was almost a conditioning for me. At this time people began to listen to music at work which was a great thing. The speed and concentration was effected by it but after starting to really resent the people I work for, and many I work with, I didn’t really care. The heir to the company once said that if a monkey could do the job, a monkey would be doing the job. A level of disrespect from a person I’ve never spoken to, born into money, I did not enjoy.
It was this time that the music began to take hold. I had ignored what I wanted to do for nearly two years, and more and more the flood gates opened. Earlier on Aim To Offends first CD was completed, though still not ready out of laziness, something new was coming. This kind of inspiration wasn’t something that you stumbled across every day. The Assholes were born.
After my daughter was born stress at work rose and so did my anger with being ignored and disrespected.
Finally after about two years living in Welland and working the night shift my health became an issue. Passing blood, fatigue, dizziness, one thing after another. The doctor put me on a medical leave. I was diagnosed with anxiety, not really a surprise, and my symptoms of what was thought to be crowns disease subsided to the point that tests were no longer needed and the illness was chalked up to stress.
After a few month of being on leave I felt there was no good way of going back to work. Being healthy and moving forward I chose to make no communications, though they were demanded of me. I felt they had done me and many others wrong enough not to worry, Christmas season or not.
After my parents fell on hard times with their job cutting much of what they make, my wife and I felt it fitting to make the choice to move back to Wellandport.
So its with sadness and joy that I say goodbye to a home that was mine for this short, but most important period of time. I’m glad to be leaving the city.
Rebecca Perle and Linda Blair engaging in shower fisticuffs, “Savage Streets”, 1984.
How Not to Start an Interview (by take5tv)
Amazingly enough, this makes me think Cusack is not a douch.